Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Will I Ever Fully Trust God?

Not until I'm perfect and in Heaven, because then I'll have shed everything that hinders REALLY knowing Him.
When I think things go wrong, my spiritual immaturity causes me to fear - be angry - confused - (insert other distrust here). Even though we grow in trust by learning more about God and experiencing His hand in our lives, we aren't going to ever "arrive" at the end of spiritual maturity. The Holy Spirit enlightens my understanding enough to see things only through a dark glass until the day I get to understand how HE sees, and experience that perfect trust.
Sometimes I will get impatient with the slow growth of trust in some area of another believer's life and have to think that God must get impatient with the laziness of my pilgrimage. Am I sincere in my rate of growth? Sometimes I forget that He wants me to become like Him, but more often than not I, just avoiding the fight that requires. It means letting go of the importance of my own concerns. Maybe I think God won't take care of them the way that I like, so again, not trusting enough to accept HIS outcome.

When God allows those hard things into my life it takes real focus to know He is totally in control even when He allows things to remain "bad", or even possibly lead to death, which we usually think of as "bad" also. If He wasn't in complete control of everything He wouldn't be ALL powerful and worthy of our trust. Therefore these hard things have to be meant for my good, in some way that I may not know while I'm alive. Probably mostly for concreting my trust, and for bringing me to a place where utter helplessness forces me to accept His control. Sometimes the way in which I handle devastation may be for the sake of those who are on the sidelines. When we come through the end of a trial we say "God is so good", but He is also good when He sees fit NOT to bring us through it here on earth and the ending is when He brings us home. Even if for many people that end is after a whole lifetime down the road. Should we think He is not good when He allows people to live their lives in awful circumstances? Does He have to explain Himself? Am I more worthy than Job? Where were you when He spoke creation into existence?

I hope someday my life might finally show a little more trust & growth than hindrances to those who need to see Christ through me. It is what our Father created us for, to glorify Him, and to learn how He wants us to do that.

Here are some good songs on the subject of trusitng God through trials.

Blessings by Laura Story

He's Always Been Faithful To Me by Sara Groves