Monday, September 10, 2012

On Loan For 29yrs And Counting

I can't believe it was almost 30 yrs ago we wondered if the Lord was going to let us keep Stevie. Not only did he have to stay in the hospital 9 days after birth for being underweight but also jaundiced so bad they were considering a blood transfusion. 5 months later he was under a hospital oxygen tent with double pneumonia and a partially collapsed lung. You could hear him sucking in each breath  with a high-pitched wheeze as we came off the elevator down the hall each morning.

 When they brought the thing in to suction his lungs, to have it close by as a last resort, I began spending the nights with him. That's when I noticed my first grey hair, sticking out like a very long white strand of kinky steel wool, at age 28. In a pivotal moment in my faith I knew I had to bring my mind to a point that I really wanted what God wanted in order to have the peace that real trust can bring. We never know the number of days God planned for us. If this was all the days He intended Stevie to bless our lives with then that's what I should want too. I could no longer pray to let me keep him. I mentally placed Stevie's body into God's arms and had peace with knowing he belonged to Him anyway, and put His will over mine. Who can know the mind of God? He wanted Stevie to stay here for now, and He wanted me to come to a place of learning how to trust. Learning to give God the reins isn't a once-and-for-all event though. We have to make the decision to trust on a regular basis. It doesn't come without a mental battle, where you win when you surrender.

Through the years he began to outgrow some problems. Like the aspirations caused by uncoordination between breathing and swallowing which probably caused his asthma attacks. The tiny hole in his heart became "unremarkable". His undersized esophagus seemed to expand just enough to minimize food choking spells. You wouldn't think now that he had any of those problems. He has been a happy, friendly kid enjoying life, and many people enjoy their time with him as well.

 Psa 71:6  By You I have been sustained from my birth; You are He who took me from my mother's womb; My praise is continually of You.